Learn To Relax

The responses to the last column were overwhelming (HELP!! I'm having stress). The sources of stress that readers sent in ranged from family difficulties to job issues. Keep adding to your lists and keep your letters and faxes coming! However, before we go on to address the stressors themselves, it might be a good idea to learn how to let go of the build-up of stress itself.

Stress builds (and builds)-Naturally
Stressors-those financial problems, down computers, merger proceedings, irate customers and even the (occasional??) difficult boss - naturally lead to acceleration of the stress response in us. We are all born with "fight or flight." As time goes on, stress tends to build and build, often without our own awareness.

Unwinding Takes Training
Relaxation takes many forms-reading a good book, watching TV, knitting, etc. Although these leisure pursuits do help us unwind to some degree, genuine relaxation involves much, much more. Deep relaxation involves a whole mind-body approach of "letting go"-and this requires training. Some of us may find self-training easy to do, and others may need professional support. However, all of us can learn how to relax with some diligence and practice.

Find a comfortable place, as free from distraction as possible. Sit or lie comfortably and let your eyes close. Begin to focus on your breathing. Make an effort to breathe deeply-filling the lungs slowly and completely. Let the breath out slowly. Continue breathing and begin to focus on a specific area of your body. Start at the head and work your internal focus through the entire body down to the feet and into the toes. Throughout this internal focusing, continue to breathe slowly and deeply. If we allow ourselves to do this for 15-30 minutes twice a day, we are "letting go" of a significant amount of stress that would otherwise just build up.

Practice, Practice, Practice?
Initially, it is not uncommon to have some difficulty with deep relaxation. It might feel "funny" or it may be hard to keep the mind focused inward. With persistent practice, however, it will get easier and easier.

This deep breathing tends to quiet our bodies. The body doesn't have to work as hard. The muscles start to unwind, blood flows evenly through the body, and the heart rate and blood pressure decrease. With regular practice, it even feels really great! Give it a try for the next three weeks and see for yourself.

Dr. Jeff Bessey is Director of the Psychotherapy & Behavioral Medicine Center. Dr. Bessey is a consultant and published author who frequently presents seminars on Stress Management and other topics. He provides post-trauma consultation to management and employees of financial institutions following robberies. He can be reached through the central office of BANKERS' HOTLINE.

Copyright © 1995 Bankers' Hotline. Originally appeared in Bankers' Hotline, Vol. 6, No. 1, 9/95