Can anyone explain to me why parents would have a fancy shmancy 1st birthday party for their kid?

I mean the kid is still clueless and will have no memory of it at all.

Oh, and we have to go.

Seems to be what they do these days, Deeq. Crazy to spend all of that money

Geesh... I mean I can understand a baptism or christening or bris or whatever, but just a 1st birthday?

It's big bucks stuff these days. Oh - and guests are expected to bring big bucks too

I don't get it, either. I've started refusing to go whenever possible. When not possible, I just make a token appearance and then leave.

I have a friend whose children are home schooled (4 & 7). When she does birthday parties for them - she invites HER friends, because the kids don't have any. It's sad.

I had a large party when my son turned 1 - however it was only family - close family. My brothers, sisters, parents and my ex's sisters, parents. That was about 20 people in a very small house.

I guess I'm crazy because I had big parties for both boys' 1st Bday. As a matter of fact, Deeq, I have a picture from Little Man's party with our 2 Stink Weeds hanging in my cube!!!

We were at a party for a 1 year old last year. 20 Family and close friends, then another 40 neighbors, friends and all of their kids. He got so many toys, there is no way he could play with them, especially considering that he's in daycare and doesn't get home until 6 at night.

Since we own a family pool hall, we had Ethan's there. There is a group of us who play pool together, and a there are a few littluns in that group. Free pool, cake, ice cream, refreshments, etc for our group of friends.

We ordered in pizza, but one other had theirs in July. We started outside (108 degrees), fired up the grill, then headed to the pool hall to cool off, play some pool and eat cake and ice cream.

Simple, fun, and pictures of littluns smearing cake on their faces.

"What you dont need another excuse for a party" (my wife)

Gosh, breaking a bottle of champagne over a 1-yr old's head doesn't seem very safe....

I don't have kids, but have been invited to several first birthday parties. I think the first birthday is less about the kid and more about the life change that this all represents for the parents. It signifies that a real transition has been made for them. So I don't mind them.

But spare me parties for your kid of any other age!

The one my sister had for her middle child wasn't that bad. She didn't even try to pass it off as a party for the kid - it was just a family bbq to which everyone brought the boy a present and there was cake at the end. It was infinitely more bearable than any of the others 1st bday parties I've been dragged to.

I can't decide (if I ever have kids) whether I should swear off parties outside of immediate family until the munchkin is old enough to have friends and know what's going on, or if I should throw huge parties in retaliation for all the ones I've had to go to.

translation: if there is no Tang served, then what's the point?

This. But the 1st birthday parties we've done have been heavily family-oriented.

My son had a fairly large 1st birthday, but with immediate family and bestest buddies and their children of comparable age. The kid walked around the ENTIRE time and sure acted like he knew it was "all about me".

and the cake all over the faces is really funny.

My brother & his wife (who have 4 kids) had a huge bday party for my niece when she turn 1. They rented a VFW hall, had it catered, had a clown and a magician. She is 11 now, I am sure she doesn’t remember it. The others did not get big parties on their 1st bday. Their 4th child who turned 1 in April my SIL was not even around for it she went to Brazil to go get liposuction.

We have a winner! Not only that, but is a great excuse for new parents to beg ... uh I mean be gifted ... all the expensive stuff that little kids require. You know, like good whiskey!

We had birthday parties for all of my kids when they turned 1--in fact usually still do. But they are just for family and really are just an excuse for everyone to get together.

And celebrate that fact that the kid made it through the first year with us as parents

Friend parties--as we call them--are a treat and only happen once or twice in your life.

who's really the clueless one here? The parents, or those who can't figure out a way to get out of going...

I've always thought the parents who invited 7,309 people to a childs b-day party were just looking for toys or gifts...i always asked my kids if they wanted to go or not...i never felt obligated to send a present if we didn't...and of course, if you are going to tell the kids during school, then everyone in class must be invited, mandatory school rule where I live, can't be seen to be neglecting little Johnny or little Susie...

fortunately, I had 2 boys and neither was really into the big party...they knew their sucker parents would get them whatever they wanted...most of our birthdays were just family (which in itself is a minimum of 15, and usually more than 30...)

Muhammad had it right! No gifts on birthdays!

It's a long story, but it is Ed's nephew and we are the only family he has, so we are going for him, not the kid, per se.

We always say "It's not a good party until you have cake in your ears."

I shouldn't say anything...

In my defense, it was a great party in a private room at a cool restaurant, and my parents (who really wanted to go all out for their only grandchild) paid for about 2/3 of it. It was just easier, since hubby's parents are divorced and having them together at our house is NOT an option. I refused to plan 2-3 separate birthday celebrations for her, which otherwise I'd have to do...

It was just for family and closest friends (who all have kids around the same age) and we got to have awesome food. Everyone had a great time and we didn't ask for any specific presents or baby gear - so this wasn't a "buy us stuff!" type of thing. We actually asked people NOT to get any "big" items as we already had everything we needed. She got a lot of great books instead. And the pictures, of everyone all together from both sides of the family, are priceless.

translation: they have Tanq and let me smoke in the house