Yes, removing the door from his bedroom and then everytime he breaks the rule you have discussed, remove furniture. The point is to let him know that HE is not in control of his life at present. Actually, one of my books on ODD states to remove everything from the room leaving only the mattress/blankets whatever is needed for sleeping, removing all but maybe 3 changes of clothing - none of them name brand - and letting him earn his possessions back with good behaviour - it must be spelled out what he gets when.

I'm the youngest of 3, and my sister (the middle child) spend most of her high school years with no doorknob on her bedroom door. Our folks didn't want to completely take away her privacy by removing the whole door, but being unable to lock it went a long way.

This. My friend did this to his teenage daughter when she lost her mind and acted out big time. Only had to do it once (the process took a few weeks for her to get back all her stuff). She had a mattress, a pillow, a blanket, one change of clothing, and no door on her bedroom the first night. He also nailed her bedroom window shut and slept in the hallway across her door (and he's a very light sleeper). Everything she loved was locked up out of her reach (all electronics, phone, books other than school books, photos, trophies, etc.). Each day that went by with her acting like a sane person and following the rules of the household, she "earned" back one item or one privilege. The door was the last possession earned back, and she wasn't allowed to lock her door for months afterward. She learned (big time) that her actions have consequences. Today, she is a sane 20something and functioning contributing member of society. Hang in there. The teenage years are really tough.

I am the lucky parent of 2 wonderful girls 22 & 18. They are both great kids but sometimes the road to get there was very bumpy. The oldest pretty much always went with the flow; the youngest, oh boy were there battles, I used to tell her she was going to behave if it killed me! and sometimes if felt like it was killing me. I will share how I made the impression to never sneak out,(might not work as well for a boy)I always told the girls " Dad & I think you are safe in your room sleeping and if you sneak out we don't know it and if something happens or someone is hurting you we would have no way of knowing and therefore wouldn't be looking for you. I can honestly say they never did it, even when some of their friends were.
I always told the girls: " you can live in this house and follow the rules and your life will be great, or you can break the rules and I will be your worst nightmare". 95% of the time rules were followed.

Good luck, it's the hardest job and no one gives you training!!

Add a liberal dose of the attitudes and morals of the society the kids live in (not the grown-up's)and VIOLA! the cr*pshoot gets even dicier.

There are no guarantees, but the vast majority turn out well. You do the best you know how and pray. That's all any of us can do.

OMG....I'm reading all of these stories and thinking to myself...I'm raising a 10 year old (cutter) and an 11 (pouter)....I don't know if I can take teenage years.

FWIW, I'm with BF here. I dont think what you're describing is some kind of huge psychological problem. Not saying you shouldn't try to stop it or punish him, but he's doing what a majority of other kids do (or would do if they were popular enough).

As for why he's doing it, there's probably a decent chance it's for the same reason any of us hang out with our friends and invite members of the opposite sex over. It's fun and pleasant and millenniums of evolution have left us biologically inclined towards it. Maybe double down on the sex/alcohol/drugs education so that there's another reason for him to control himself beyond "because i said so". That way he at least knows the reality of the potential consequences.