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#2032216 - 08/06/15 08:04 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
BowlingQueen Offline
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Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 2,920
Wisconsin
Skittles, hoping to hear news that the procedure went well for your dad. smile

fun_grandma, I don't have any words of advice, but prayers to you and your family to find the answers that you need. smile
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#2032241 - 08/06/15 08:39 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
MyBrainHurts Offline
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 960
Illinois
fun_grandma, You may want to see if one of the nursing homes in your area has a staff member to talk to. When my mom went from an independent living center to nursing care, the center's social worker called me and discussed their evaluation of her. Perhaps a home in your area has a social worker or counselor that could give you some guidelines.

Praying for you and Skittles and Busy Bee. These are really difficult times.

My dad has been gone 15 years (unbelieveable) and mom for 9, and I see them frequently in my dreams. Whenever I do, it's always the mom and dad I remember back when they were healthy and happy.
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#2032296 - 08/07/15 01:13 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
RR Joker Offline
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Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 20,656
The Swamp
What Brain said. Talk to the pros.

Brain, how nice! smile. Lucky you!
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#2032339 - 08/07/15 03:06 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
Truffle Royale Offline

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You may not have to jump to nursing home care right away. Check out elder care services offered in your parents' community. Social Services may have recommendations or you can check community boards, etc.

One of the biggest problems my daughter has with dementia patients at the nursing home is that they tend to wander off or try to leave the building simply because they don't understand the dangers anymore. So while you mom has a lifeline button, it's probably best to look for someone to come stay with her when your dad goes out. That same person could help with her cares which would ease the burden on your dad and his back.

It might also be a good idea to set up a family meeting with her doctor to discuss her care and ask for his guidance and recommendations.

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#2032559 - 08/08/15 07:13 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
Skittles Offline
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Skittles
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Posts: 13,965
TN
Dad did well - and then that afternoon he had to have a pacemaker. His heart did not have natural rhythm. He's getting out of cardiovascular ICU today and put in a 'regular' room. He may get out tomorrow or Monday - and then off to rehab.

fun grandma - while I don't have any advice for you - you do have my prayers.
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#2032594 - 08/10/15 02:19 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
waldensouth Offline
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FINALLY ABOVE the gnat line
so glad to hear that your dad is doing better, Skittles.
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#2032618 - 08/10/15 03:36 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
justsayjulie Offline
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back home again
I hope your dad continues doing well, Skittles...
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#2032628 - 08/10/15 03:56 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
Pale Rider Offline
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under the Lone Star
Amazing, just amazing that someone that old can pull through and get to rehab. Gives us hope when the day comes we are there.
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#2032640 - 08/10/15 04:42 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
Skittles Offline
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TN
Thanks for everyone's kind words. Not in rehab yet. He's not eating - nothing sounds good. I told him over the phone this morning that if he wanted to get out of the hospital he needed to eat. The surgery was a HUGE success, but dad is down in the dumps right now. Hopefully he'll improve enough in the next day or two to get to rehab.
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#2032645 - 08/10/15 04:54 PM Re: Caring for our parents fun grandma
QCL Offline
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QCL
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,259
NW IL
Prayers skittles. Keep being diligent. And get him moving.

Originally Posted By fun grandma

My mom has Alzheimer's, in the somewhat earlier stages yet.
...

My question is how do you know when it is time for them to go into a nursing home with an Alzheimer's unit?
I realize everyone's situation, etc are different. But are there some guidelines, or somewhere you can call and ask questions?


fun grandma, You will just know.

There was a day when grandma left the house to go for a walk and we lost her for 4 hours. She could not remember how to get back.
And she told us it wouldn't happen again. And then it did. (This time an uncle that lives close by was watching for it.) The next week she called 911 because of an intruder - it was my grandpa - she didn't know him anymore. The next day, the same thing, she called the police, my grandpa called my dad and my dad called the nursing home.

The next week we moved her in. And soon after, she tried to stage an escape with the other residents. laugh laugh (She was a feisty one.)

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#2032654 - 08/10/15 05:15 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
Busy Bee, CRCM Offline
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Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 1,089
PacificNW
QCL - I'm sure that was a stressful time for your family, but what memories you have!! I found it rather funny that she tried to stage an escape with others! I can only imagine the conversation they had while in their planning stages! laugh

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#2032657 - 08/10/15 05:16 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
CompliantOkie Offline
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CompliantOkie
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 425
OOOOOOklahoma
So glad to hear the surgery went well. He must be a very strong man because that surgery is no picnic. Praying for his spirits to lift and his appetite to come back!!

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#2032701 - 08/10/15 06:53 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
RR Joker Offline
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Posts: 20,656
The Swamp
Dementia in any form can be horrible and entertaining all at the same time. Try to find the humor as often as possible.
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#2033659 - 08/13/15 09:19 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
Busy Bee, CRCM Offline
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PacificNW
Got a call from my mom this morning and she said that they were sure today would be the day that my grandpa was going to pass away. He was telling my mom and grandma that he was dying and then was talking about being with the Lord in Heaven. But...he rallied again and actually ate some breakfast today. What an emotional rollercoaster this has been!

He was talking in his sleep when I visited at lunch. Kept talking about rebar and metal bearings. Then, in his sleep, he was pointing his finger and said, "If you go two miles an hour slower, then you wouldn't have a problem and it will be much better." We figured one of his kids or grandkids was getting a lecture about speeding! laugh As difficult as this end-of-life process has been, we are grateful for the positive memories that are being made.

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#2033956 - 08/17/15 02:37 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
TINKerBell Offline
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Tiger's Den!
How's your grandpa today Busy?
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#2034299 - 08/18/15 06:03 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
Busy Bee, CRCM Offline
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PacificNW
Sadly, grandpa passed on Sunday morning. What a blessing it is to know he's no longer suffering and to know where he is! And we had time to say our goodbyes to him. He was ready to go.

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#2034314 - 08/18/15 06:34 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
Truffle Royale Offline

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Condolences and prayers for you and all your family, Bee.

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#2034324 - 08/18/15 07:06 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
Skittles Offline
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TN
I'm so sorry, Busy.
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#2034372 - 08/18/15 08:20 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
MyBrainHurts Offline
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 960
Illinois
Very sorry, Busy Bee, and wishing you many happy memories of your grandpa.
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#2034467 - 08/19/15 01:41 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
CompliantOkie Offline
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Joined: Dec 2013
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OOOOOOklahoma
My condolences Busy Bee. May you find comfort in your many happy memories.

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#2034487 - 08/19/15 02:09 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
TINKerBell Offline
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Tiger's Den!
My deepest condolences Busy.
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#2034505 - 08/19/15 02:43 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
BowlingQueen Offline
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Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 2,920
Wisconsin
Sorry for your loss, Busy.
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Nothing changes, if nothing changes. (from a good friend of mine) smile

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#2034534 - 08/19/15 04:17 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
waldensouth Offline
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waldensouth
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FINALLY ABOVE the gnat line
Oh Busy, I know you and your family will miss him even as you are glad he is no longer suffering. My deepest sympathies with your loss..
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- Frederick Douglass




My Opinion Only.

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#2036763 - 09/02/15 02:34 AM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
HRH Okie Banker Offline
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Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,070
Oklahoma
Just saw your post Busy. I am sorry for your loss. Sending prayers to your family.

Can I ask if anyone has a recommendation for an auto-ship, discrete, diaper company? My mom is so embarrassed to purchase them and hates to ask anyone to help her get them. I live two hours away, so maybe an auto-mail? I am going to see her this weekend and have 7 dzn in my car for her so she should be set up for a while.
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#2036799 - 09/02/15 02:09 PM Re: Caring for our parents Truffle Royale
Truffle Royale Offline

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Have you checked Amazon? They have literally everything and it all comes in boxes marked Amazon. They have repeat shipment options too.
Otherwise, you might try the company website for the brand you've already purchased. The address should be on the package. I'm sure you're not the first person to come up with this issue so a call or email to them might be able to set it right up.

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