Wasn't sure about posting but perhaps it will help me. I lost my beloved husband of 37 years to a heart attack this July. No warning. We were actually on vacation and the night before were watching TV and getting ready for a picnic planned the following day. The next morning, I was making coffee and my husband called out and said his heart was beating really fast. Called EMS, etc. but he just fell to the floor and was gone.He was my best friend and the most honest, gentle and thoughtful person. Loved nature and all the beautiful gifts it provides us. We didn't see this coming. He was in good shape and had seen a doctor the week before. No signs of what was to come. Nothing. . He cherished life. Our motto was "miss nothing". Simple but it says everything about they way he viewed his time on earth. It is very difficult knowing that I will never hear his voice again. Never have one of his reassuring hugs or hear him tell me he loves me. I know that I will need to take each day and move forward. Work keeps me sane, to some level but I am so so lonely for him. It scares me because I sometimes feel that I will not be able to get over this feeling that actually makes it hard to breath.

Trees, my heart is breaking for you. I don't know the right words to say to help you right now, but just know that my thoughts and prayers are with you. It may not feel like it to you right now, but I know you will get through this.

Oh my gosh, I am so sorry. My deepest sympathies go out to you. I can't imagine the heartbreak. I wish I had words of wisdom that would make it better but I think time is the only thing that will dull the pain. Again, I'm so sorry.

I am not sure what your relationship is with the Lord, but I will pray for enduring comfort and strength for you. Do you have someone that you are talking this through with? A friend, family member, support group? Know that you are loved, even by someone who doesn't know you, only through these words on a screen. {{{hugs}}}

My heart breaks for you Trees. I am very sorry for your loss. It sounds like you had a wonderful relationship with your husband. I cannot imagine the pain you are living with. Time does not heal all wounds when it comes to loss but slowly your happy memories will start to overtake the pain and loss you feel. I've seen this happen with my mom who lost my dad to a heart attack 7 years ago. They were together for 31 years. She still misses him but mostly remembers the happy days they spent together. My hope is your happy memories carry you through this difficult time. I'll say a prayer of comfort for you.

Trees, my brother died unexpectedly, so I have an inkling of how sudden death hits those left behind. In your case tho, it was your other half. My heart and prayers go out to you.

There are bereavement groups available through various avenues. Does your FI have EAP available to you? That would be the first place I'd go. Your Dr and even online groups may help too. You need support during these times and the best kind will likely come from others who have lived through similar circumstances.

I, for one, am here to listen (or in a pm) if you ever just need to get it out.
TR

I'm tearing up just thinking about this. It appears you had an amazing life with the man of your dreams. I hope you cherish that always - and although we've never met here's a reassuring {{HUG}}. Prayers always.

I'm so very sorry, Trees. I don't know what to say. I know you miss him horribly. I hope you find comfort in happy memories and in knowing he loved you.

So sorry to hear that! I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

I am so sorry to hear that Trees. My thoughts and prayers are with you! May you find something to bring you comfort in the coming months. I love your motto, such a smart way to live. {{{HUGS}}}

Trees:
There are no words that I can say to take the pain away, but as others have stated, the happy memories will always be there to comfort you. A friend of mine recently lost her 21 year old son to cancer and in my search for a card I found one with this message.
"When a loved one becomes a memory the memory becomes a treasure" Thoughts and prayers to you and your family.

I am so sorry for your loss Trees. I lost my dad in January. He and my mom had been together for 43 years. I felt helpless, not knowing what to do for her or how to make things better. I found a book by C.S. Lewis called A Grief Observed that really gave me some insight into what she was feeling and going through. For instance, he describes how you want people around you but you don't feel like talking, you just want to know they are there and that you are not alone. My mother told me that was exactly how she felt.
You are in my prayers Trees. Rest assured that you are not alone, God has you in the palm of his hand and will help you through this very difficult time. God Bless!

I am very sorry to hear of your loss, Trees.

So sorry to hear of your loss. Many many prayers of peace and comfort go out to you today. Love your motto. Remember him and how he would feel if you lost moments in unbearable grief. Or if he would be happy to know he's causing you this pain. NOPE, so for his sake and because he's still here comforting you, go join a group of some kind. It helps and there are widow's groups out there that can help a lot. I too do not know you or where your faith is but I am here as are we all. Hang in there, you have suffered a great loss and it's "ok and normal" to feel what you are feeling.

My most sincere condolences to you! I cannot imagine what you have been through loosing your spouse, but please know you are in my thoughts and prayers.

Thank you for reaching out, even in this forum setting. Very sobering post to read. You must have married the same year as I did.

I will pray for you that God will both heal your wounded heart and sweeten the treasured memories.

Trees,
I am so very sorry for your loss. To call it a loss, some how cheapens the pain that is so very real for you. My heart aches for yours. May our words bring you comfort and a peace. May the good Lord hold you up when you are weak. I am so sorry.

Very sorry for your loss Trees.

I am so sorry for your loss Trees. I will pray for God's comfort to overwhelm you.

I am so sorry for your loss Trees. May God's grace and peace be with you through your season of grief.

I'm very sorry, Trees. That is heartbreaking. So few people find that special one. Obviously you did. Cherish that.

Bless your broken heart. As someone who felt similar grief when my father died several years ago I don't know how you're getting out of bed in the morning. How does the world keep turning when yours is so shattered? It's a mystery many of us have felt.

I'm so sorry that you didn't get to say goodbye to him and tell him exactly what he meant to you. That alone can provide some comfort when you're grieving. But he knew what he meant to you Trees, I'm sure he did. You were a gift to him as he was to you - cheers to you both for maintaining the type of marriage many of us only dream about.

If I may offer some humble advice....look for and try to appreciate one small (and they will be tiny for awhile) positive every day. Take baby steps towards planning something different with a girlfriend, something you've never done before. And from a practical standpoint, find something to help you sleep on the bad nights because lack of rest aggravates the grief.

My heart aches for you. Keep putting one foot in front of the other while continuing to cherish his memory. I'll be sending positive thoughts your way for a long time.

I just read this Trees and hit really hit me hard, I have lost four people close to me in the last month, one passed Wednesday (44 years old) and another was a co-worker ( 48 years old - good friend and confidant) that I found in her office about a month ago who had a massive stroke and died at the hospital the next morning. I know this has been said, but remember the good times. The fact that you were together for 37 years says a lot and that you all made a lot of good memories together. I am not going to tell you it gets better because I still feel the losses like it was yesterday, but I get up everyday and sometimes I cry and move forward. I used to think the world would stop, but it does not. Good positive thoughts and prayers for you and your family.

I am so sorry, Trees. My heart hurts just thinking about what you have been going through. I wish I had the words to take your pain away. Hugs to you and God give you the strength to get through this one day at a time.

Sorry for your loss Trees. Remember everyone grieves in their own way & time. My cousin lost her son and grieve support groups have helped her. Don't be afraid to lean on your family and friends.