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#2158236 - 12/22/17 04:55 PM English Can Be a Weird Language
GuitarDude Offline
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This is just a place to post phrases that play on the weirdness of the English language. For example:

Please do not meddle with my medal made of metal. And please don't peddle flower petals or bicycle pedals.

laugh
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#2158242 - 12/22/17 05:07 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
edAudit Offline
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edAudit
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You are here
I do not speak English: I speak American, so sorry.
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#2158251 - 12/22/17 05:27 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language edAudit
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Why do we drive on the parkway, and park in the driveway?
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#2158265 - 12/22/17 05:50 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
MB Guy Offline
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Way, way south.
Amazing how there are three different pronunciations of the letter "e" in Mercedes.
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#2158269 - 12/22/17 06:18 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language MB Guy
GuitarDude Offline
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Originally Posted By MB Guy
Amazing how there are three different pronunciations of the letter "e" in Mercedes.


Add "Benz" and there's a fourth! But that is German... wink

Why do ships carry cargo and cars carry shipments?
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#2158271 - 12/22/17 06:32 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
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Queue. Remove the last four letters, and it is still pronounced the same.
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#2158280 - 12/22/17 07:41 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
GuitarDude Offline
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I am present to present you with this present. It would have been early if I had present it.
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#2158304 - 12/22/17 09:53 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
HappyGilmore Offline
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Pulling people out of the ditc...
All the beer he had had had had no effect on the outcome of his life!
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#2158355 - 12/26/17 04:03 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
burkemi Offline
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We went throughout the storage closet and threw out all the junk.
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#2158358 - 12/26/17 04:06 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
raitchjay Online
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OK
It bugs me when people pronounce "jaguar" as "jag whar". Maybe when i say "jagwire" it bugs them, i dunno. Oh....and like the guy in the car commercial, "jag U ar" isn't any better.
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#2158373 - 12/26/17 05:54 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language raitchjay
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Invalid: meaning varies depending on whether you put the accent on the first or the second syllable.
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#2158382 - 12/26/17 08:01 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language raitchjay
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Originally Posted By raitchjay
It bugs me when people pronounce "jaguar" as "jag whar". Maybe when i say "jagwire" it bugs them, i dunno. Oh....and like the guy in the car commercial, "jag U ar" isn't any better.


ˈjaɡˌwär smirk
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#2158383 - 12/26/17 08:03 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
RR Joker Offline
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They're over there where their family lives.
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#2158393 - 12/26/17 08:49 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language RR Joker
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"Fat chance" and "slim chance" are roughly equal estimates of the probability of something happening.
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#2158394 - 12/26/17 08:56 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
RR Becca Offline
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out of the frying pan...
"Neat as a pin."

Can anyone tell me just what it is about a pin that qualifies it as the paragon of neatness?
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#2158396 - 12/26/17 09:04 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
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Well, a pin is minimalistic in nature...slim, clean and shiny..so yeah...fairly neat I'd say smirk
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#2158398 - 12/26/17 09:08 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
RR Joker Offline
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Now, speaking of 'neat'. How did that ever become the designated description for a plain whiskey, bourbon, et al. Why is that 'neat'? After a few, I would think it should become 'sloppy'.
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#2158400 - 12/26/17 09:10 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
raitchjay Online
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OK
I think it's weird that if you are referring to an individual as "you", the proper form of *to be* is considered to be the plural "are" as opposed to the singular "is".

He is going to the store.
She is going to the store.
Tim is going to the store.
Sheila is going to the store.
You ARE going to the store.

Just really doesn't make sense. (Yes, i get that "you is going to the store" sounds funny, but it wouldn't if we grew up saying it.)
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#2158403 - 12/26/17 09:17 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language raitchjay
RR Becca Offline
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out of the frying pan...
Originally Posted By raitchjay
(Yes, i get that "you is going to the store" sounds funny, but it wouldn't if we grew up saying it.)


And those who did grow up saying it that way are referred to as hillbillies. wink grin
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#2158404 - 12/26/17 09:18 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
raitchjay Online
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OK
laugh
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#2158429 - 12/27/17 01:46 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
burkemi Offline
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Two should work; to buy 3 would cost too much.

The wind up toy was blown away by the wind.

By the way, are you going to buy that?

frieze, freeze, frees
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#2158502 - 12/27/17 07:50 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
MyBrainHurts Offline
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"I do not speak English: I speak American"

Do you mean like"

sweater - jumper
underwear - pants
water fountain - bubbler
trunk - boot
truck - lorry

I converse on the internet with some people from the UK that claim to speak English, but I can't understand it. I've never gotten the hang of rhyming humor (or humour). They call us Septics. I didn't get it. They explained, Yank rhymes with Tank, as in Septic Tank, hence Septics. Ok, whatever.
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#2158509 - 12/27/17 08:11 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
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I went on a European trip the summer after high school, and I could understand German better than the English spoken in the UK.
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#2158576 - 12/28/17 03:32 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
Citrus Offline
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I before E . . . .

... except when your feisty foreign neighbor Keith leisurely receives eight
counterfeit beige sleighs from caffeinated atheist weightlifters.

Weird.

smile


orig joke by comedian Simon Taylor

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#2158610 - 12/28/17 06:25 PM Re: English Can Be a Weird Language GuitarDude
one deer Offline
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Any where but work
You can bounce a ball, e.g. toy; attend a ball, e.g. dance; or have a ball, e.g. fun
Years ago we had a foreign born pastor at our church who had been in the USA for years, we told him our children had a ball a their house and he was under the impression they had left a ball at his house and we were asking for it back, there was some fast explainin' going on; LOL.

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