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#423175 - 09/15/05 05:38 PM Wisconsin Blonde
Beagles22 Offline
Power Poster
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 3,626
State of confusion
As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde Wisconsin woman catches up. She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door. The trucker lowers the window, and she says, "Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load."
The trucker ignores her and proceeds down the street.
When the truck stops for another red light, the girl catches up again.
She jumps out of her car, runs up and knocks on the door.
Again, the trucker lowers the window.
As if they've never spoken, the blonde says brightly, "Hi my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!"
Shaking his head, the trucker ignores her again and continues down the street.

At the third red light, the same thing happens again.
All out of breath, the blonde gets out of her car, runs up, knocks on the truck door.
The trucker lowers the window.

Again she says "Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!"

When the light turns green the trucker revs up and races to the next light.

When he stops this time, he hurriedly gets out of the truck, and runs back to the blonde's car.

He knocks on her window, and as she lowers it, he says, "Hi, my name is Kevin, it's winter in Wisconsin, and I'm driving the SALT TRUCK!"
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#423176 - 09/15/05 05:47 PM Re: Wisconsin Blonde
DeeQ Online
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DeeQ
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 40,766
Turnpike Exit 10
That made me laugh out loud!!!
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#423177 - 09/15/05 07:26 PM Re: Wisconsin Blonde
someone else Offline
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someone else
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 3,300
back to my roots
What's a salt truck? (I'm assuming salt is used when there is ice on the road?)
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#423178 - 09/15/05 07:32 PM Re: Wisconsin Blonde
deppfan Offline
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 5,184
All over the map.
Yep, that's a salt truck.

TWO BLONDES
Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking. And one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away, Florida or the moon?"

The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida?"




CAR TROUBLE

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly. She says, "What's the story?"

He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor."

She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"



SPEEDING TICKET
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.

She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"




RIVER WALK
There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, "How can I get to the other side?"

The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side!"




AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE

A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.

"Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me."

The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left breast and screamed; then she pushed her elbow and screamed in even more. She pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream.

The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are you?"

"Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde."

"I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is broken."





KNITTING
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!"

"NO!" the blonde yelled back; "IT'S A SCARF!"





BLONDE ON THE SUN

A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!"

The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"

The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!"

The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian.

To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!"





IN A VACUUM
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"

She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"





FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?" "Hellooooooooo......," answered the blond. "They're watch dogs."
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#423179 - 09/15/05 07:35 PM Re: Wisconsin Blonde
ChicagoGuy Offline
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ChicagoGuy
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 1,575
Chicago, IL
Those were some great ones!

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#423180 - 09/16/05 12:46 AM Re: Wisconsin Blonde
doodle Offline
Platinum Poster
doodle
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 888
colorado
Quote:

What's a salt truck? (I'm assuming salt is used when there is ice on the road?)




Ha! I love it! This is what I had to go through when I moved from California to Colorado. It seemed like everytime I opened my mouth during my first "real" winter people looked at me like I was from Mars. Sometimes I really miss SoCal.
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You can never get enough of what you don't need to make you happy.~ Eric Hoffer

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#423181 - 09/16/05 01:45 PM Re: Wisconsin Blonde
William Offline
Gold Star
William
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 470
In a location
My daughter is a blonde (and SHE likes to tell blonde jokes), I will tell these to her today. I know she will think these are great! I do! The At The Doctor's Office is my favorite.
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#423182 - 09/16/05 01:53 PM Re: Wisconsin Blonde
slick Offline
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slick
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 3,030
somewhere out there
Quote:

What's a salt truck? (I'm assuming salt is used when there is ice on the road?)




Are you serious? Where are you from?
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it ain't over til it's over...

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#423183 - 09/16/05 05:39 PM Re: Wisconsin Blonde
Pirate Offline
Diamond Poster
Pirate
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 2,495
Florida
Apparently, she was the blonde driving the car...
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