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#567344 - 06/15/06 05:08 PM Re: Kids....no kids?
waldensouth Offline
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waldensouth
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 7,979
FINALLY ABOVE the gnat line
As with all things, there are days when, as a parent, I say, "and I did this because?" As in this morning when my child was refusing to get dressed, we were running late, and I threatened to take her to daycamp naked! You commit to take the bad with the good. Raising a child is definitely NOT for those who don't want children. I, personally, don't think any less of those folks who made an informed decision based on self-knowledge. It's both challenging and rewarding. You learn things about yourself that you didn't know before children. sometimes you like what you learn and sometimes you don't. You learn a whole lot about self-sacrificial love when you raise kids.
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#567345 - 06/15/06 07:23 PM Re: Kids....no kids?
Anonymous
Unregistered

Quote:

I wonder if there's anyone here who would admit to having children and regretting it?




I know of only one person who has ever admitted this to me. I co-worker of mine, upon learning that I did not want to have kids, told me that if she had it to do over again she probably would not either. She is a great mom and her kids are so lucky to have her. And she does not regret at all how her life turned out - nothing like that at all. I'm probably not representing her well because she loves her kids as much as anyone I have ever met - you could not pry them away from her with a crowbar. But knowing what she knows now she would have chosen differently or at least for different reasons.

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#567346 - 06/15/06 07:32 PM Re: Kids....no kids?
lexicgrace Offline
New Poster
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 15
New Mexico
I am really looking forward to having kids when I am married and financially stable, but I think it is great that other people don't want kids. It's not like we have a shortage of children in the world, and there are plenty of other great ways to contribute to society. It is far worse to have children for the wrong reason than to not have tham at all.

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#567347 - 06/15/06 07:45 PM Re: Kids....no kids?
Darkhorse Offline
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Darkhorse
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 501
out of my mind
I have two kids . . . but they are the four legged kind Two Great Danes are plenty to keep us busy.

I wanted kids when I was much younger, but I went though a bad divorce where the ex was trying to pressure me into having kids (to trap me in the marriage in my opinion) and it just totally turned me off. I'm an only child married to an only child but we both have step-fathers with children and grandchildren so our moms don't bug us too much about it.

The other side is that we enjoy traveling, going out to eat at a moments notice, etc. It takes much more coordination and planning with kids. Also, I worked for several years in a trust department. Funny thing, the rich people didn't seem to have kids (or one at the most). Besides, with all the bad things happening in the world I can't see bringing someone into it to deal with the drugs, rapes, murders, abuses, etc. I'm not saying that other people that do are wrong, just that I'm not comfortable with that responsibility.

Nanwa and SP, I'm so with you on the furniture and shopping. It's a special day when tables get moved to get vacuumed under and why would anyone fight the crowds to go shopping when the internet is so easy to use?
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#567348 - 06/15/06 08:18 PM Re: Kids....no kids?
CRAatBOK Offline

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Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 6,172
Further South than I wanna be.
Quote:

I wonder if there's anyone here who would admit to having children and regretting it?




My mom used to say that to us kids all the time, "I wish you were never born" Gee, isn't that a lovely thing to say to your children.
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#567349 - 06/15/06 08:19 PM Re: Kids....no kids?
Nanwa Offline
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Nanwa
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 5,564
Clintonville, WI, USA
I have seen tee shirts with quotes like "Raising kids is like being pecked by ducks" and "Raising teenagers is like trying to nail Jell-o to a tree." So I would assume that, some people, sometimes, might question their decision. But, all in all, the majority of parents want their kids and are glad to have them.

The unfortunate ones end up too frequently on the nightly news.
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#567350 - 06/15/06 08:20 PM Re: Kids....no kids?
Beige Offline
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Beige
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 3,950
Quote:

Quote:

I wonder if there's anyone here who would admit to having children and regretting it?




My mom used to say that to us kids all the time, "I wish you were never born" Gee, isn't that a lovely thing to say to your children.




Yeah...although I'm adopted, similar experience. When I was about 7 I pulled the "You don't love me" thing on my Mom. She said, "You're right, I don't". What a mom. She should have stayed childless! She hasn't spoken to my sister or me in years. Yippee!!
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#567351 - 06/15/06 08:23 PM Re: Kids....no kids?
MichelleDawn Offline
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MichelleDawn
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 5,994
My parents have never said anything to us, but we teased Mom all the time when she was screaming at us that she should have decided if she actually liked kids before she had them.
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#567352 - 06/15/06 08:25 PM Re: Kids....no kids?
Hrothgar Geiger Offline
10K Club
Hrothgar Geiger
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 10,395
Jersey Shore
There was a line on TV the other night:
"God gives us children so that death will not come as such a disappointment."

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#567353 - 06/15/06 10:59 PM Re: Kids....no kids?
~~~izzo~~~ Offline
Platinum Poster
~~~izzo~~~
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 513
NY
When I was younger, I swore I'd never have kids. I had no desire what so ever. And then I met the hubby and things all changed. Now, I can't imagine life without children. It just sounds so cold and lonely. Christmas with no santa. No easter bunny. No tooth fairy. No Barney birthday cakes or painted handprints with the finger prints on the wall poems. No hugs or I love yous. Wow. It's endless.... No, I couldn't give it up.

::God gave us children so we can learn to grow up to be just like them::
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#567354 - 06/15/06 11:02 PM Re: Kids....no kids?
slick Offline
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slick
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 3,030
somewhere out there
Quote:

When I was younger, I swore I'd never have kids. I had no desire what so ever. And then I met the hubby and things all changed. Now, I can't imagine life without children. It just sounds so cold and lonely. Christmas with no santa. No easter bunny. No tooth fairy. No Barney birthday cakes or painted handprints with the finger prints on the wall poems. No hugs or I love yous. Wow. It's endless.... No, I couldn't give it up.






that was very well put! if you can't have kids, that's one thing....but to willing give all that up.....well, i can't understand why you would want to.
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#567355 - 06/15/06 11:33 PM Re: Kids....no kids?
MichelleDawn Offline
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MichelleDawn
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 5,994
Quote:

When I was younger, I swore I'd never have kids. I had no desire what so ever. And then I met the hubby and things all changed. Now, I can't imagine life without children. It just sounds so cold and lonely. Christmas with no santa. No easter bunny. No tooth fairy. No Barney birthday cakes or painted handprints with the finger prints on the wall poems. No hugs or I love yous. Wow. It's endless.... No, I couldn't give it up.

::God gave us children so we can learn to grow up to be just like them::




But you have to realize that those are things that just don't matter to some people. I don't think it's particularly nice to say someone's life is cold and lonely if they don't share your opinion. JMO
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#567356 - 06/16/06 12:22 AM Re: Kids....no kids?
~~~izzo~~~ Offline
Platinum Poster
~~~izzo~~~
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 513
NY
Quote:

Quote:

When I was younger, I swore I'd never have kids. I had no desire what so ever. And then I met the hubby and things all changed. Now, I can't imagine life without children. It just sounds so cold and lonely. Christmas with no santa. No easter bunny. No tooth fairy. No Barney birthday cakes or painted handprints with the finger prints on the wall poems. No hugs or I love yous. Wow. It's endless.... No, I couldn't give it up.

::God gave us children so we can learn to grow up to be just like them::




But you have to realize that those are things that just don't matter to some people. I don't think it's particularly nice to say someone's life is cold and lonely if they don't share your opinion. JMO




No SP. If I had no children, it would be a cold and lonely place for me. But, then I've had a taste of what it's like to have children, so I can't go back. This is how I feel. I did not mean for my statement to appear otherwise. You choose to not have kids. There is nothing wrong with that. Like I said, at one time, I felt strongly against having kids myself. I was quite happy with my lifestyle the way it was. I blame it all on the hubby. He corrupted me. (thank God!) lol So, by all means. Live it up.
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#567357 - 06/16/06 12:30 AM Re: Kids....no kids?
MichelleDawn Offline
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MichelleDawn
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 5,994
Quote:

Quote:

Quote:

When I was younger, I swore I'd never have kids. I had no desire what so ever. And then I met the hubby and things all changed. Now, I can't imagine life without children. It just sounds so cold and lonely. Christmas with no santa. No easter bunny. No tooth fairy. No Barney birthday cakes or painted handprints with the finger prints on the wall poems. No hugs or I love yous. Wow. It's endless.... No, I couldn't give it up.

::God gave us children so we can learn to grow up to be just like them::




But you have to realize that those are things that just don't matter to some people. I don't think it's particularly nice to say someone's life is cold and lonely if they don't share your opinion. JMO




No SP. If I had no children, it would be a cold and lonely place for me. But, then I've had a taste of what it's like to have children, so I can't go back. This is how I feel. I did not mean for my statement to appear otherwise. You choose to not have kids. There is nothing wrong with that. Like I said, at one time, I felt strongly against having kids myself. I was quite happy with my lifestyle the way it was. I blame it all on the hubby. He corrupted me. (thank God!) lol So, by all means. Live it up.




Husbands will corrupt you every time.
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If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

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#567358 - 06/16/06 12:48 AM Re: Kids....no kids?
~~~izzo~~~ Offline
Platinum Poster
~~~izzo~~~
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 513
NY
Quote:

Quote:

Quote:

Quote:

When I was younger, I swore I'd never have kids. I had no desire what so ever. And then I met the hubby and things all changed. Now, I can't imagine life without children. It just sounds so cold and lonely. Christmas with no santa. No easter bunny. No tooth fairy. No Barney birthday cakes or painted handprints with the finger prints on the wall poems. No hugs or I love yous. Wow. It's endless.... No, I couldn't give it up.

::God gave us children so we can learn to grow up to be just like them::




But you have to realize that those are things that just don't matter to some people. I don't think it's particularly nice to say someone's life is cold and lonely if they don't share your opinion. JMO




No SP. If I had no children, it would be a cold and lonely place for me. But, then I've had a taste of what it's like to have children, so I can't go back. This is how I feel. I did not mean for my statement to appear otherwise. You choose to not have kids. There is nothing wrong with that. Like I said, at one time, I felt strongly against having kids myself. I was quite happy with my lifestyle the way it was. I blame it all on the hubby. He corrupted me. (thank God!) lol So, by all means. Live it up.




Husbands will corrupt you every time.




You got that right!
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Fake it. ~~~fur is dead~~~

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#567359 - 06/16/06 04:48 AM Re: Kids....no kids?
Citrus Offline
Diamond Poster
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 1,139
I always wanted children and always thought I would have them, but so far I have not. But I love kids. And as a matter of fact, family from out of town just left 5 hours ago, after being here 2 1/2 weeks.

To tell you the truth, instead of feeling like "whew, we can all sit down" - I feel sad and miss them terribly already. The kids ranged from 2 to 10 and brought a lot of fun and fresh air to our home.

I do my part, though - I'm the bestest auntie to all of my nieces, nephews, and friends' children. (But I would have loved to raise my own...) Anyway, truth be told, the world needs aunties, right!

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#567360 - 06/16/06 12:23 PM Re: Kids....no kids?
Anonymous
Unregistered

Quote:

I wonder if there's anyone here who would admit to having children and regretting it?




Hitler's parents?

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#567361 - 06/16/06 12:59 PM Re: Kids....no kids?
Nanwa Offline
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Nanwa
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 5,564
Clintonville, WI, USA
Just because I don't have kids, doesn't mean I don't have kids in my life. My friends kids, my nieces and nephews; I am involved in their lives to some extent. Just not 24/7/366. What I like is, now that many of them have grown into young adults, our friendships have continued. I have friends spanning all generations.
Last edited by Nanwa; 06/16/06 12:59 PM.
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