Marie. Here is what the regulation says and the contract must have been entered into prior to the call to active duty not afterwords as you say they quoted from their manual.
"A service member who, prior to entry into active duty, entered an installment contract for the purchase of real or personal property, will be protected under the SACRA if the service member's ability to make the payments is "materially affected" by the military service.
The service member must have paid, prior to entry onto active duty, a deposit or installment under the contract.
The seller is then prohibited from exercising any right or option under the contract to rescind or terminate the contract, to resume possession of the property for nonpayment of any installment due, or to breach the terms of the contract, unless authorized by the court."
You should also understand this:
"It's important to understand that the Act protects you in very limited ways and is not an end-all to your owed debts. You are still liable to pay your debts but are afforded somewhat of an extension and leniency while on active duty.
Your credit suffers however…
Unfortunately while the Soldiers and Sailors Relief Act may protect you from collections and lawsuits while on active duty, it does not, however, guarantee that you will not suffer the creditors' wrath via your credit reports. Sure the loan may be deferred or your local bank may put it on hold but it may not stop the delinquency from being reported on your credit reports and ruining your good credit"
Go to this website
http://www.military.com/Resources/ResourcesContent/0,13964,31042,00.html
Don't go this alone The people at the bank you have contact with are in a defense mode and have no idea how to handle this other than try and make you go away. Arguing about how long it took to get your car back with these folks will get you no where. You should contact someone in a higher position in the bank like the presidents office to get this resolved, or contact your husbands Guard unit and see if they can put you in contact with someone at the Judge Advocate office.
Frankly someone in a higher authority level in the bank should be notified what happened to you so they can make sure it doesn't happen again.
And frankly you have an excellent legal case against the bank as much as I would not like that to be.