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#199097 - 06/10/04 06:09 PM
Why Men Are Just Happier People
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Diamond Poster
Joined: May 2001
Posts: 1,873
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I just got this today.....thought you'd like to read it.
Why Men Are Just Happier People
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours
Wedding plans take care of themselves
Chocolate is just another snack
You can be president
You can wear a white t-shirt to the water park
Car mechanics tell you the truth
You never have to drive to another gas station because this one's just too icky.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress $5,000----tux rental $100
People never stare at your chest when you are talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood, ALL the time
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks
A five day vactation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You don't have to stop and think which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You don't have to shave below your neck.
Your belly usually hides your big hips
One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.
You can "do" your nails with a pocketknife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
_________________________
Riding the waves of change.....2014
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#199098 - 06/10/04 06:22 PM
Re: Why Men Are Just Happier People
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Gold Star
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 455
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Quote:
You know stuff about tanks
That one came out of left field...but makes sense! Tanks are another type of big toy!
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#199101 - 06/10/04 06:53 PM
Re: Why Men Are Just Happier People
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Power Poster
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,990
Cincinnati, OH
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Quote:
I just got this today.....thought you'd like to read it.
Why Men Are Just Happier People
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
You know, sometimes the undeserved stereotypes of men can work to our advantage!
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#199102 - 06/10/04 07:00 PM
Re: Why Men Are Just Happier People
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Power Poster
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 6,719
PA
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Quote:
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
OK. I'm a man, and I'm happy. But I have 8 pairs of shoes that I wear regularly. Am I doing something wrong?  
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#199104 - 06/10/04 07:04 PM
Re: Why Men Are Just Happier People
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Power Poster
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,990
Cincinnati, OH
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Quote:
Quote:
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
OK. I'm a man, and I'm happy. But I have 8 pairs of shoes that I wear regularly. Am I doing something wrong?
ABSOLUTELY! Anything more than 1 pair of athletic shoes, 1 pair of dress shoes, and one pair of shoes your wife/mother/etc. has been begging you to throw out for years is too many!
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#199105 - 06/10/04 07:04 PM
Re: Why Men Are Just Happier People
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Power Poster
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 6,719
PA
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
OK. I'm a man, and I'm happy. But I have 8 pairs of shoes that I wear regularly. Am I doing something wrong?
Well, are any of them "dress pumps"?  
No dress pumps for me. I don't want my feet to get cut, mangled, and blistered. 
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#199106 - 06/10/04 07:06 PM
Re: Why Men Are Just Happier People
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Power Poster
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,990
Cincinnati, OH
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
OK. I'm a man, and I'm happy. But I have 8 pairs of shoes that I wear regularly. Am I doing something wrong?
Well, are any of them "dress pumps"?
No dress pumps for me. I don't want my feet to get cut, mangled, and blistered.
Here is the true question that will tell you if you have gone too far! Do you choose which pair of shoes to wear or just grab the pair that you want to wear? i.e. Do you worry if the shoes match your jeans or are "in season"?
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#199107 - 06/10/04 07:08 PM
Re: Why Men Are Just Happier People
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Diamond Poster
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 2,261
Between Here and There
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Quote:
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
I've got two pairs of dress shoes (brown & black), a pair of tennis shoes, my ranch/casual boots, and a pair of sandals 
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#199108 - 06/10/04 07:09 PM
Re: Why Men Are Just Happier People
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10K Club
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 40,766
Turnpike Exit 10
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Keep it up, Mike, and this will turn into another: "Why does he wear white socks with loafers and shorts and other strange things men wear" thread... And Jac, dress pumps are murder on the feet! she turns away, muttering: he should have a pair of dress pumps and suffer like us women!! 
_________________________
Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please. - Mark Twain
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#199110 - 06/10/04 07:13 PM
Re: Why Men Are Just Happier People
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Power Poster
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 6,719
PA
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Quote:
Here is the true question that will tell you if you have gone too far! Do you choose which pair of shoes to wear or just grab the pair that you want to wear? i.e. Do you worry if the shoes match your jeans or are "in season"?
My dress shoes need to match what I'm wearing. The other stuff doesn't really matter. I'll wear sneakers, loafers, sandals, or boots based on the weather and/or what's on the top of the shoe pile. The only other exception would be my old, ratty, torn up sneakers which I use for yard work.
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#199112 - 06/10/04 07:17 PM
Re: Why Men Are Just Happier People
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Diamond Poster
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 2,261
Between Here and There
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Quote:
Quote:
and a pair of sandals
Yeah, but are they high-heeled sandals?
Howd ya know!!
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#199113 - 06/10/04 07:17 PM
Re: Why Men Are Just Happier People
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Power Poster
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 6,719
PA
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Quote:
he should have a pair of dress pumps and suffer like us women!!
Hey! At least you can ease your suffering- any kind of suffering- with chocolate. We men have no such panacea.
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#199114 - 06/10/04 07:47 PM
Re: Why Men Are Just Happier People
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Power Poster
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,990
Cincinnati, OH
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Quote:
Quote:
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
I've got two pairs of dress shoes (brown & black), a pair of tennis shoes, my ranch/casual boots, and a pair of sandals
Exactly 3 pair of shoes (cowboy BOOTS and Sandals don't count!)
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#199116 - 06/10/04 08:40 PM
Re: Why Men Are Just Happier People
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Power Poster
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,990
Cincinnati, OH
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Quote:
Quote:
We men have no such panacea.
Hate to say it, Jac, but most men call it "beer". 
He has a point.....
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#199117 - 06/10/04 08:43 PM
Re: Why Men Are Just Happier People
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Power Poster
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 5,564
Clintonville, WI, USA
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I've been known to wear one black shoe and one navy shoe. I have two pair of flats, same style, just different colors. In the wee hours of the morning, they can look alike.
Although heels make women's legs look good, I have reached the age of reason: there's no reason to walk around in that kind of pain, just to look good!
Personally, I think sneakers look good with a suit.
_________________________
Member of the National Sarcasm Society - like we need your support!
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#199120 - 06/11/04 02:34 AM
Re: Why Men Are Just Happier People
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Power Poster
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 6,719
PA
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Quote:
Do you also use "products" on your hair?
Yep. Gilette products. 
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