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#370973 - 06/08/05 07:02 PM
Old Farts???
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Power Poster
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 3,030
somewhere out there
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Have my hubby and I become old farts? We have been married for a year and in the past 2 years we have just become so blah. He doens't shave, doesn't get haircuts, is always in sweats or gym like clothes. I have gained almost thirty pounds - yes 30 - and we do not do anything. Our friends always said we were a nice young good looking couple who was a lot of fun and loved to party with the best of them. Now I don't do anything cause I "feel fat" and he using me feeling fat as his reason he doesn't do anything anymore. I have a started a serious diet and exercise program and I am finally starting whip my self in shape, he on the other is a bum, a big sloppy bum who guite honestly discusts me. Now I know when cuples get married things change. But we are only 24 and 25. Any suggestions or comments?
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#370974 - 06/08/05 07:05 PM
Re: Old Farts???
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10K Club
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 40,766
Turnpike Exit 10
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I would explain to him how you feel, and include him in on the diet. Take walks together; we always go to the beach, it's quiet and we can walk and talk... Remind him of what you guys used to do together.
And good luck.
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Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please. - Mark Twain
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#370975 - 06/08/05 07:09 PM
Re: Old Farts???
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Power Poster
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 6,559
Foxboro
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Unfortunately, it is easy to fall into that rut. DQ makes some great points-my wife and I did the South Beach diet together last year-made it a lot easier than just having one of us on it. We try to go on walks, and go to the gym together. Does he want to work out, lose weight etc? Has anything changed in his life?
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#370976 - 06/08/05 07:13 PM
Re: Old Farts???
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Anonymous
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Being married only changes things if you allow it to. My honey and I have been together going on 9 years. We have only been married for the last year. Nothing for us changed, except that we treat each other even better than before. Seemed that making that extra commitment of marriage brought us even closer together. Is there anything else that may have caused such a tragic change in your lifestyles? Was getting married something your both wanted?
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#370977 - 06/08/05 07:46 PM
Re: Old Farts???
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10K Club
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 10,124
Way, way south.
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Anon, unfortunately many if not most people fall into this rut. I did it in my marriage. Something with the comfort factor and not having to go out and find something maybe. I believe it's the cause of many partings of married couples unfortunately.
Suzy, I think you are on the right track. You have to take care of yourself first and then I bet he will pick up on it and start taking better care of himself. You can't do it for him, he needs to realize it himself and get moving again. Good luck.
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#370978 - 06/08/05 07:51 PM
Re: Old Farts???
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Anonymous
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#370979 - 06/08/05 07:52 PM
Re: Old Farts???
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Anonymous
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#370980 - 06/08/05 07:56 PM
Re: Old Farts???
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Power Poster
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 3,030
somewhere out there
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Thanks, but that is the problem. My husband has this thing, which I will not go into now, that keeps him from gaining weight. He is always eating a lot of food with alot of calories and fat and that is the opposite of what I want to do. He also work outs but is only doing bulk building exercise. That is the trouble. I am going low cal and low fat and working to lose weight, he his eating the opposite and working to gain wieght.
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#370981 - 06/08/05 08:01 PM
Re: Old Farts???
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Power Poster
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 3,030
somewhere out there
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Do not even joke about pot with me. If I could destroy every pot plant in the world, I would do it. Along with golf
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#370982 - 06/08/05 08:04 PM
Re: Old Farts???
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Could the two of you go to the gym together? Him to pump up and you to work it off?
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#370983 - 06/08/05 08:07 PM
Re: Old Farts???
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Power Poster
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 6,298
San Diego, CA
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i don;t think i am ever going to get married after reading this!
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Dabbling in banking, law, accounting...the life of a trustee.
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#370984 - 06/08/05 08:16 PM
Re: Old Farts???
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Anonymous
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Don't say that dipitous. Marriage is what you make of it. COMMUNICATION, COMMUNICATION, COMMUNICATION.
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#370988 - 06/09/05 01:41 PM
Re: Old Farts???
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Anonymous
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#370989 - 06/09/05 05:03 PM
Re: Old Farts???
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Power Poster
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 7,332
WOOHOO
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Quote:
I'm there! What next????
Unfortunately, next - you are going to die!
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#370990 - 06/09/05 08:00 PM
Re: Old Farts???
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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not nice - not nice at all.
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#370991 - 06/09/05 09:10 PM
Re: Old [censored]???
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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I got married one...oh wait it was twice...actually it was three times. But my 1st and 2nd wife is the same person. It takes work both parts. You both have to be willing to change.
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#370992 - 06/10/05 06:12 PM
Re: Old [censored]???
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Quote:
have more sex
This always works for me.
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