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#974341 - 06/12/08 09:08 PM A man and his ostrich
RR Sarah Offline
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RR Sarah
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 2,507
Up North
A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders.


The man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke,' and turns to the
ostrich, 'What's yours?'



'I'll have the same,' says the ostrich.



A short time later the waitress returns with the order 'That will be $9.40 please,' and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment.



The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke.'



The ostrich says, 'I'll have the same.'



Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.



This becomes routine until the two enter again. 'The usual?' asks the waitress.



'No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a salad,' says the man.



'Same,' says the ostrich.



Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, 'That will be
$32.62.'



Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table.



The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer. 'Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change in your pocket every time?'



'Well,' says the man, 'several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.'



'That's brilliant!' says the waitress. 'Most people would ask
for a million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!'



'That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce,
the exact money is always there,' says the man.



The waitress asks, 'What's with the ostrich?'



The man sighs, pauses and answers, 'My second wish was for a tall chick with a big butt and long legs who agrees with everything I say.'
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Sometimes you have to burn a few bridges to keep the crazies from following you.

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#974344 - 06/12/08 09:11 PM Re: A man and his ostrich RR Sarah
Pale Rider Offline
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Pale Rider
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 34,318
under the Lone Star
heheheheheeee

gotta be careful what we wish for!!!

and the slang we use for the opposite sex!
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Societies that do not find work in and of itself "pleasing to God and requisite to Man," tend to be highly corrupt.


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#974345 - 06/12/08 09:13 PM Re: A man and his ostrich Pale Rider
RR Jen Offline
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RR Jen
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 3,760
Running and riding everywhere ...
LOL!
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I don't need any more negativity in my life...be positive and helpful people or I will kick you in the shins!!!

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#974488 - 06/13/08 01:28 AM Re: A man and his ostrich RR Jen
kitten Offline
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kitten
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 12,579
Not prison
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I shall call you Thunder Twonk. ~TfD

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#974507 - 06/13/08 02:23 AM Re: A man and his ostrich kitten
kms Offline
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kms
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 6,436
God Bless America
good one
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#974540 - 06/13/08 11:24 AM Re: A man and his ostrich kms
Retired DQ Offline
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Retired DQ
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 40,766
Turnpike Exit 10
Nice!
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Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please. - Mark Twain

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#974544 - 06/13/08 11:38 AM Re: A man and his ostrich Retired DQ
Skittles Online
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Skittles
Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 13,965
TN
Now that is cute!
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My Opinions Only

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#974563 - 06/13/08 12:33 PM Re: A man and his ostrich Skittles
Snow Bunny Offline
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Snow Bunny
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,141
In the Snow :)
Ditto!
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The woods are lovely dark & deep & I have promises to keep & miles to go before I sleep and miles to go before I sleep

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#974590 - 06/13/08 12:59 PM Re: A man and his ostrich Snow Bunny
MB Guy Offline
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Joined: May 2004
Posts: 10,124
Way, way south.
Whew, the first time I read the title I thought it said "A man and his crotch."
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