Hey Bankguy,
If anyone checks off "multiple times widowed", can we find out who it is?
Kind of makes me nervous after watching Lifetime "Deceit" movies all day yesterday...

that does make one nervous doesn't it... do they have to disclose this information before a new date?

That's what we need, a new regulation:

Regulation Uh-O: Truth in Dating

Three days before your first date, you must provide to the other party your current credit report and financial statement. Prior to a second date, any arrest record and a 20-year judgment search showing any names or aliases used in the past must be provided to the other party.

Failure to disclose, or to disclose in timely manner, shall preclude you from any further dates with the aggrieved party, and may subject you to further penalties, including, but not limited to, being forced to watch Trista and Ryan's courtship over and over and over again.

LOL Steve! I actually know someone who interrogates her dates about their financial status and their career path on their first date. And she wonders why she never gets a second date?
(No Steve, I won't introduce her to you, she's too ditzy for you!)

Reminds me of the following:

Application for Permission to Date My Daughter


NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, school history, job history, ancestral lineage, DMV printout, and a current medical report from your doctor.

NAME______________________________________ DATE OF BIRTH______________

HEIGHT____________ WEIGHT_____________ IQ__________ GPA_____________

SOCIAL SECURITY #___________________ DRIVERS LICENSE #________________

BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES______________________________________________

HOME ADDRESS__________________________ CITY/STATE___________ ZIP_____

Do you have ONE male and ONE female parent? ___________________________
If NO, please explain ____________________________________________

Number of years they have been married ________________________________
If less than your age, explain ________________________________________

Do you own a van? _____________A truck with oversized tires?___________
A waterbed?_____________A pickup with a mattress in the back?__________
A condom?_______________Pornography?_______________Do you have an
earring,nose ring, or a belly button ring? ________A tattoo?___________

(IF YES TO ANY OF THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION AND LEAVE PREMISES)

In 50 words or less, what does LATE mean to you?_______________________

In 50 words or less, what does DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER, mean to you?
_______________________________________________________________________

In 50 words or less, what does ABSTINENCE mean to you?_________________

Church you attend ______________________________________________________

How often you attend ___________________________________________________

When would be the best time to interview your:
father? _____________ priest? _______________
mother? _____________ parole officer? _______

Answer by filling in the blank. Please answer freely, all answers are confidential.

A: If I were shot, the last place I would want shot would be:
_____________________________________________________________________

B: If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my:
_____________________________________________________________________

C: A woman's place is in the:________________________________________

D: The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is:
_____________________________________________________________________

E: When I first meet a girl, the thing I notice about her first is:
____________________________________________________________________

NOTE: if answer E begins with T or A, discontinue. Leaving premises
keeping your head low and running in a serpentine fashion is advised.

What do you want to do IF you grow up? ______________________________
_____________________________________________________________________

What is the current going rate of a hotel room? _____________________

Condoms come in packages of (circle one)
A: 3
B: 6
C: 9
D: 12
E: ALL OF THE ABOVE

How do you know?_____________________________________________________

I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE
BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICAN
ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE WATER TORTURE, RED HOT
POKERS, AND HILLARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE.

_______________________________________
Signature (that means sign your name, moron)

Thank you for your interest. Please allow four to six years for processing.
You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do not
try to call or write (since you probably can't, and it would cause you injury).

If your application is rejected, you will be notified by two gentleman
wearing black shirts and white ties carrying violin cases (you might
want to watch your back).

Have a nice day.

What about us guys that have been married three times but the 1st and 3rd wife are the same person?