This has been a rough day for me with my youngest daughter. She's fifteen and a real handful. Anybody got any words of encouragement for me? I sure could use it.

I raised two sons, no daughters but I can tell you that all teenagers turn into adults one day!! Just keep pluggin away, someday you will 'become smart' again in her eyes.

Take heart. The fact that you are feeling strain and stress means that you are an involved, caring parent. Just what a teen needs -- even though she doesn't think so right now. So many parents don't give [censored] about their kids--it's nice to see some that do.

Been there. Done that. Got the t-shirts (one pink and one blue) and I'm heading into round two with the ten year old grangirl that lives with me.

Just look back at her as a 5 year old and take everything and multiply it by three. That's about what you're dealing with emotionally, isn't it?

I agree with Wendolene. It's great that you're in touch and involved. Too many kids don't have the luxury of even one caring parent. Hang in there. And come here and let it all hang out whenever you need to! We're here to hear you.

I REALLY appreciate all of this encouragement. You know that saying "sometimes you're the windshield, sometimes you're the bug"? Well, I have definitely been the bug today. I know that someday she'll snap out of this but that day seems a long way off. And being the only parent in the home just makes me feel more pressured. I'm glad you all understand.

Two words: Boarding school

Don't give up!
I have one too. It's like Dr. Jeykl and Mr. Hyde!
Be the parent and hold on to your sanity.
It gets better inch by inch and then goes back foot by foot.
Someday it will stay wonderful.
Pray to God too.

i don't have teens, but i was one. bbs had a good suggestion.

other than that, all i can offer is good thoughts and hugs from new england. and hopefully, like me, she will learn to appreciate you as her mom and consider you her hero.

Ask one of your friends, your age, that your teen likes, to talk to her. Sometimes coming from someone other than Mom helps her to realize you really are making sense.

Also, tell the friend that if your daughter confides in her, that you won't pump the friend for the info. Sometimes, a teen needs to talk about confidential things but not with Mom. Be sure your friend has your values though, so she will give similar advice.

I say this because I have no children, yet my friends' teens like me and feel they can talk to me as a friend and not an adult. I don't judge them and can sometimes offer advice that they would never listen to if Mom was saying it. So far, they haven't told me anything that was serious enough to bring Mom in on, so I haven't betrayed their confidences.

I'm also a single parent and we're just beginning those puberty years! I bought her her first bra last night.. sniff.... Without the support of my friends I church - I doubt if I would make it. One of my friends has her youngest daughter in her 1st year of college. She's worried about "sex and the single girl". we're thinking of trading daughters for advice - since I am single perhaps K would listen to me. Its an interesting roller coaster ride that I wouldn't miss for the world.

Although I'm firmly convinced that God made teenagers so that parents would have no problem booting them out into the world as adults!

Don't give up. There is light ahead in the tunnel. My son thought my husband and I were horrible parents during his teen and college years. That's because we wouldn't let him do what a lot of his peers were doing and we held him accountable for his actions. But now that he is an married adult with children of his own we have becomed human beings again and he calls us (mainly his father) for advice all the time. I think he realizes now that we are not as dumb as he thought we were.

I have five kids; three of them are teenagers. Our church has been the biggest help with our kids. The youth minister and his wife are awesome! The support that my kids get from being involved in the youth group at church has made a significant difference in how they handle things.

Boarding School is appealing at times. My older daughter wants me to send my younger daughter to one of those youth camp, chain gang type things. Now, today my youngest acted like a normal person. Teenage insanity - you gotta love it!

Prayer is the only thing that gets me through the bad days. If it weren't for the Lord I would not have been able to make it. I saw my oldest daughter go through things last year that were very bad and at times it seemed like I couldn't go one more step. When the police department recognizes your voice when you call, you know you have a problem! But my oldest daughter is doing so great now! I know the same will happen to my youngest, I just have to keep marching on towards that goal.

Thank you all for the words of wisdom. I will try a little bit of everything.

Excellent idea!
When I was a teenager, my Mom and I had a lot of issues, and her best friend is the one that was often the person who brought us together.
She tried to make us both understand where the other was coming from, without being judgemental.
I'm still in contact with her, even states away and 'all growed up', I still value her advice.

And she still gets to play peacekeeper between my Mom and I once in a while!

The only problem with getting her to talk to someone is that she doesn't express herself very well. That's part of the problem. She keeps things so balled up inside of her that when she can't take it anymore she explodes. I do like the idea of her talking to someone other than me. I will definitely work on that. My sister has tried to help talk to her in the past but my sister never had children and so it's hard for her to know exactly what she should say or do.

I feel your pain...really. I've said so many times "it's not age that gives us grey hair..it's the kids!"...I'll be glad when my son is at least 35, but I've got a long way to go yet!

I have a fifteen yr old daughter, she is the last one at home THANK GOD!!!! I too feel your pain. One day we take three steps forward and the next, it is ten steps back.
You know when we where younger and our moms said that we would pay for our raising, well guess what, she was right...
All I can tell you is to keep on trying,talking, and a WHOLE LOT OF PRAYING....
I hear it gets better.
My wo oldest ours boys, and I can tell you without a doubt, they where much easier as teens than my daughter...
So, I am sending you warm hugs and prayers and good thoughts from Louisiana..

Your daughter is alike like mine. Even like I was and am. Keeps things inside and then explodes. The only difference now for me is that I analyze what I keep inside as adult and can sort them out and take care of them. As a teenager they can't right now.
We are also dealing with a high school friend of hers that committed suicide this past week, and another of her male friends that is having a hard time at college and is very depressed. We have talked some and its true you as a parent can be there at all times and express your love and understanding but they need someone outside family and friends to let go with- we are talking about getting my daughter counseling.
I pray every night that she comes out of her stupor and help her see that she can't save everyone and she needs help to see that.

Keep telling your kids you love them and keep giving them hugs!
A big hug and prayers to you also that you stay strong!

As much fun as I had when I was a teenager I would not want to live through that emotional turmoil again. I don't have any advice but I will include you and your daughter in my prayers.

Just because he becomes 35 doesn't mean he'll be independent/on his own! I see lots of the kids go out and their own and can't cut it and boomerang back to Ma and Dad. Many don't learn how to manage money or don't have the work ethic. Many have unrealistic ideas that a college degree automatically means a fat paycheck.

Awww, Nanwa..did you have to go and spoil the nice thought?

I recently remarried and my son was having a terrible time adjusting. Every day was a battle to get him to go to school and his anger was out of control.

After many heart to heart talks and seeking counseling he has adjusted and is doing better. Believe me he still has his moments but he knows I will do anything to help him through whatever's bothering him.

Even if they fight you on it, constantly reminding them that you love them, goes a long way.

It's up to us as parents to instill a strong work ethic & morals in our children. These kids are so used to instant everything (fast food, internet, atms) that they don't realize that alot of people worked and toiled for many, many years to achieve things that are so easily ready for them today. If we teach them, and remain strong through the bad days (and I am talking to myself here) then hopefully they will grow up, become productive adults, and won't even think about moving back home. When I left home after marrying my mom & dad gave me my bedroom furniture and pretty much let me know I wouldn't be coming back. It left a strong impression in my young head!

When my daughter was 12 1/2 I swear an alien ship came and took her away and left me with a crazy person that looked just like her. I would literally ask her some days "are you an adult today that wants to be left alone or are you a little girl that wants comforted?" It was a tough few years but she out grew it and now has two girls with one on the way. I just smile at the thought of her with three teenage girls - triple the fun.