Reg B requires age & marital status on home purch or refi of occupied principal dwellings, secured by that dwelling. Therefore a HI loan would not require that we get age & marital status. Is it a violation if we get it on these types of loans?

I would say no violation. Although marital status and age are part of the Reg B monitoring information, in many states you need to know marital status to determine spousal rights. Also, if you are writing CL/A&H you need the age of the borrower(s), since most policies I have seen will not cover someone who is 65 years old at application or will turn 65 during the term of the loan.

If it is an unsecured individual credit request you should not be getting marital status.

If it is a secured credit request then you are allowed to ask about marital status.

We get "date of birth" on all our credit requests.

In regard to marital status, you'd be ok in a community property state because you need the info to determine responsibility for debts. (all debts of the community are the responsibility of both husband & wife - no matter which one actually made the debt)

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In regard to marital status, you'd be ok in a community property state

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Yep. I never had to deal with a community property state, so 90% of the time I forget about them.