Some Days Nothing Goes Right

Michael Jacobs tried to rob a drugstore in Mesa, Arizona, but dropped his toy gun on the floor during the attempt, and it broke into pieces.

He ran out.

That night he tried to rob a supermarket. When the cashier opened the register to get change for him, he sprayed her in the face with pepper spray. He then tried to grab cash from the drawer, but she slammed the drawer shut, screaming.

He ran out.

As he was running, he had an asthma attack, and had to stop to use his inhaler. He finally got to his car, only to find he had locked the keys inside. He broke the window, and finally drove away. Unfortunately, in his haste, he forgot to turn on his headlights, and a police officer pulled him over for driving with no lights.

While the officer was checking him out, the call came through from central dispatch about the attempted supermarket robbery. Unlucky Michael was promptly arrested and booked.

Thank heaven he got stopped before attempting to rob a bank!

Copyright © 2002 Bankers' Hotline. Originally appeared in Bankers' Hotline, Vol. 12, No. 4, 5/02