This is why:

11. Being a Slob
10. No E-mail Etiquette
9. You're Condescending
8. Too Much Information
7. You're Lazy
6. You're the "Stinky Lunch" Guy
5. You're a Backstabber
4. You're a "Debbie Downer"
3. You're Noisy
2. You Have No Manners
1. You're Never on Time

1a. You want them to do their job!

AND you want them to do it correctly.

1b. you spend all your time on BOL creating lists

::Picks teeth, clips toenails and fartz::

No....I dont think its any of those.

Or anytime you disagree slighty with someone, you CC all sorts of people unrelated to the conversation as like a, "TAKE THAT" kind of thing.

11.3 You drop the names of senior management to try to intimidate me into doing your nefarious bidding.

You make them cry.

You suddenly stop parking in the same spot you've parked in for 4 years and start parking in the spot i've been parking in for 4 years.

If the list is only 11 points long, you're not trying hard enough!

They look better than you in 6 inch stilletos.

You whistle.

...poorly.

You constantly refer to yourself in the 3rd person.

I'll add:

You ask the same questions all the time about how to do your job but NEVER take notes.

You still rip people that have been gone for a long time.

1.a(ii) You are the Compliance Manager and constantly point out how dumb they are.

You refuse to learn how to use even the simpliest of computer programs.

Fixed

12. You reheated salmon and burned popcorn in the lunchroom microwave on the same day.

13. Your nickname is "Crop Duster"

14. You can not identify any of your female coworkers faces but can identify them all from the neck down.

this sounds like a gift

I was hoping you would not realize I was talking about you....